You don't have to have the words.
Processing your feelings doesn't just have to be talking.
When I was an adolescent, before I knew how to get help or begin to heal and love myself, I didn’t have any words for what was happening inside me. So I painted. I painted it out. All my emotions. All my fear. All my love. My heartbreak all poured itself into a wordless translation of emotion into the world to be witnessed in whatever way I could manage.
People commented on brushstroke and composition. Not many understood my rage and wounds.
I eventually came to the words that also helped me move some of these things through my body. And I only painted intermittently. But lately I am again out of words for my experience. I have once again turned to paints and paper to process what is happening in me that is not so neatly organised with these black and white symbols on the page.
Painting is like a filtration system for my feelings. The rage that randomly burns through me needs to give me its message and dissipate like the watercolours I’m using.
A treasured friend and I had a conversation about the experience and purpose of rage. That we can measure the breadth of our untended sorrows by its scope, maybe. And I realise when I have no words and can only paint, I paint what I love deeply. Tend your sorrows and your loves however you can.
So if you can’t say or write what’s moving through you, that’s ok. Find other ways. Walk, shake, paint, carve, cook, dance… however you can is perfect.
Want to know more about “How to Give Yourself Permission?” Download my short audio course today and begin the journey of being more kind to yourself while you learn to take action. https://www.slsourwine.com/howtogiveyourselfpermission