I saw an email today that had a subject line about “why you don’t call your clients back” and it made me think of all those ever present signposts in our life that are supposed to be warnings to us to pause for a minute.
When we just can’t things like returning calls or emails, or doing the dishes or even nice things like meeting friends—things that have no big meaning on a different day—we need to recognize those moments are a call to stop and take care of yourself. We get the stop memo right sometimes by not doing those things, but when we just can’t that also comes with all sorts of inner monologue about shame and judgment about ourselves because we didn’t. Because we know those actions aren’t that big of deals on a different day and we don’t understand why we won’t just gird ourselves up and do them. We feel like we are failing.
The trick is in that moment to consciously decide to set things down for a minute while you go take care of the real emergency—your own health and well being. I hate that its almost cliché to say maybe you need a nap or something nice to eat with multiple food groups involved. But maybe you do. Maybe you need a walk and to listen to some birdsong. Or to just let your eyes rest on a far horizon that isn’t a screen. Maybe you need 20 minutes on a treadmill to burn some things off. Maybe you need a playlist and a dance break. Maybe you need to sit in the dark and quiet until you feel like coming back out.
And of course that doesn’t feel like what you should be doing or that it won’t be worth it. We have not constructed our modern world (internally or externally) in any way that supports this kind of care of self. But it’s time to change that. We get to change that.
You don’t have to notice or act on every one of those warning signs to make a difference. But each time you do it will be a shifting in favour of your own well being and ability to actually get to the good stuff you want to do in this world.
You’ve got this.
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